paris baby same as paris doll, OED

ps (perhaps) announces that "the long blonde hair is up for auction" in a recent thread of the nj.com forum "nostalgia." no clarification from ps re. value at auction of nature-made v. bottle-dreamt. (most head props on "girls" over 12 created in a salon, though. have to assume that auction-goers abrade their noses for the unreal head, that most unreal demands the highest bid, that most unreal passing for most real-like sells to the man , no doubt, in the seersucker suit. this, predictable, post-hitchcock/post-warhol: grace kelly slurps campbell's tomato soup oil-off-canvas).

pony up for the realest paris head from a bottle! (her father asked for a mil, just to talk on camera with his paris baby out of jail).

paris head, 1561. S. Adams Househ. Accts. R. Dudley (1995) 132 (OED citation): "Paid for a parryes head with other furnyture for the chieff mourner at my ladies buryall," and (c1596 in Gentleman's Mag. (1819) 89 I. 23): "Next after them came the Lady Strange..in her paris head, tippit, wimple, vaile [etc.]."

paris heads, not necessarily blonde, but covered with something white.

single file to view the paris doll! (also from the OED: a dummy or mannequin dressed in the latest fashion, used by dressmakers as a model).

paris doll, since 1745: (1745 Gentleman's Mag. Oct. 553/1) "But Paris-dolls, by fashion and mamma, Tricked off, ‘all glare without distinction gay’," (1761 H. MANN Let. 2 May in H. Walpole Corr. (1960) XXI. 501) "His wife..is the Paris doll here, but too outrée to be followed," and (1950 P. BOTTOME Under Skin xii. 106) "The Paris doll, splendid in turquoise-blue taffeta under a golden lamé coatee, was poised within reach of Henriette's hand."

paris dolls, not necessary posed for autopsy, always for auction, but what's the difference, REALLY, definitely on display and for sale.

my sister says "everyone's got their price." but don't ya think sell out blonde heads should stake grey heads, aka ps. OED: (1702 STEELE Funeral V. i. 79) "Else Boys will in your Presence lose their Fear, And laugh at the Grey-head they should revere."

Kill the Blonde

Paris is burning in an L.A. jail.
After a claws-out flurry, the networks now maintain they aren't actually competing for the Exclusive! Paris-in-the-Sprung Interview.
Paris called Barbara Walters from jail to say that she had "found god." Since we heard this from Barbara Walters, this constitutes Hearsay in a court of law. But since it is incrementally being revealed, to beasts who tread the earth, that Barbara Walters very likely IS god, it follows that Paris's assertion must be true. Clearly she possesses Barbara Walter's personal cell number. Moses didn't get any closer than that.
Paris has been spending her time in jail reading and answering her fan mail. Word on the cable news shows and the progressive talk radio stations has it that she "dots her i's with a heart."
They say she might have bipolar disorder. They say she takes medication every day.
A friend who visited her in jail said it was unbelievable how beautiful she looked without make-up.
One report on cable news showed an aerial view of what they said was Paris's house, and related that since her incarceration her dogs have been wandering from the premises and her ginger tabby cat got run over by a car.
Paris is an Aquarius. She shares a birthday with Michael Jordan. Today both of them, like me, are having a three star day.

If you go to www.ParisHiltonAutopsy.com, you will find the teenage winners of a writing contest. Their task was to write Paris Hilton's obituary after viewing a sculpture called "Paris Hilton Autopsy" by Daniel Edwards. The stated purpose of this sculpture (more views at http://www.caplakesting.com/parishiltonautopsy/index.htm) was to confront young people with the apocalyptic consequences of drunk driving. (Full disclosure: "apocalylptic" is my word, not that of Mr. Edwards, his gallery or Mothers Against Drunk Driving, who supported this project.) The sculpture depicts Paris Hilton lying in death on an autopsy table, arms opening outward and head turned in a pose that from the torso up evokes classic depictions of the Madonna, except that on Paris's chest her Chihuahua Tinkerbell (not apparently in rigor mortis herself; in fact seemingly alive and bewildered) stands straining toward the face of her mistress. Both appear nude, with the exception that each wears a tiara of the distinct Princess Diana style. From the waist down Paris Hilton looks like the victim of a sex murderer given to posing his trophies. It is a "hands on" exhibit, and for an added punch the kids who are its target audience can remove Paris's internal organs, including her uterus, which in this exhibit features a "double abortion": fetal twins, to underscore the "tragedy."

Mel Gibson. George W. Bush. Vin Baker. These people have also been arrested for drunk driving. They are not "dumb blondes." Paris Hilton's blood alcohol level at the time of her arrest was .08%. Check out your state's laws. Don't forget the pregnancy test! And maybe leave the tiara in the closet.

Suzanne Somers was also known as "dumb blonde." Her IQ is 154 (the same as Raquel Welch's; both self-reported). Madonna's (not "the Madonna" referenced above) is 144. Marilyn Monroe was a Gemini: "Two for one--more than two!" she joked. Like Princess Diana, she died at the age of 36, but not of drunk driving, unless you want to call it that. You could probably get a book deal if you do.



"Watcha gonna do when you get outta jail?
I'm gonna have some fun
What do you consider fun?
Fun, natural fun!"

"Genius of Love" by the Tom Tom Club

"Hello, Dad? I'm in jail! And I like it! It's nice! Say hi to Mom from jail!"

From What Up, Dog? by Was (Not Was)

street sighting

and wondering what happened to cbgb's? well, it's become a homeless shelter:

out of the blonde, 4mm

rayosunshine posted this to the "nostalgia" forum on http://www.nj.com. takes us back to the beginning:

4116.
If you were to write your own epitaph or eulogy:
what would you say? I would say "She had a wicked sense of humor, could make you laugh in an instant. She loved her husband, but always took time to love all the poor animals too. A true gentle heart.

PS. The long blonde hair is up for auction!"

(by rayosunshine, 6/18/07, 19:34 ET)

road trip stall off

had a flash idea a few weeks ago: take a road trip to ps' home town. thought it might put some juice in my blog muscles, a bit flaccid lately, and spark an insight or two -- geography's not destiny, of course, but geography can tell some story.

first, needed to know the name of her town. a snap, you might think, but she's from sjersey, where i also live these days, and where names of towns change regularly, where towns split off from or become incorporated into larger townships sometimes with the same name as one of the towns (extremely confusing!). have to be "in the know" about all the splitting off and incorp-ing, or else you're lost all the time (my condition most of last year if i veered off route 30 or route 9).

sjersey road trip lesson 1:
the map changes,
gotta "go with the flow" (Madonna, "Vogue"),
juggle then and now maps in mind before setting out and during the trip.

i recently read that ps grew up in deptford township (exit 12 off 42, an exit i mistakenly took on my first trip to sjersey, thinking i was getting off the ACE in galloway, so i knew how to get there from route 30; everyone in sjersey knows how to get to deptford twnsp apparently since deptford has the only indoor mall in the area); however, i have also read that she grew up in woodbury, a city close to deptford twnsp, in fact a recent split off (deptford has actually shrunk since its incorp. in 1695 from 106 to 18 sq. miles., according to the twnsp website). deptford still retains "woodbury" in the names of two sections: woodbury terrace and woodbury gardens. good intent, is the name of another section, fyi. quakers and other religious groups settled in both deptford twnsp and woodbury, and the two places maintain roots to these religious traditions (note: sjersey was an important station on the underground railroad, transporting escaped slaves farther north after they made it across the delaware).

sjersey road trip lesson 2:
history matters,
otherwise every place looks the same, condos mcdonalds' outbacks mall-sprawl -- and, in sjersey, undevelopable wildlife refuge or pinelands reserve areas.

since i wasn't sure whether to head out for deptford twnsp or woodbury, i decided to people search ps' mom (beverly) and two sisters (kimberly and linda); maybe they still lived in the town where ps grew up. maybe i'd give a call before i left. didn't find any particularly useful information, though, not an address or phone number that i knew without a doubt corresponded to ps' mom's or 2sis'. however, woodbury and deptford were among the places listed as previous residences for all three names. but only confirmed what i thought i already knew: ps grew up somewhere in gloucester county.

sjersey road trip lesson 3:
cool out when you're going in circles,
take a cigarette break, buy a cold diet coke (down it till you burp), chat up a local, watch the entire last season of something on-demand, as scarlett o'hara said, "tomorrow's another day."

the day after that day, turned on the computer again and searched (long shot, i knew) the deptford twnsp and woodbury websites. thought, maybe, beverly held a local position, or ps' 2sis, or ps went back to read poetry with school kids at one of the local libraries, or ps performed at a summer music event. but, no. however, the woodbury website contained links to the local paper. so i searched "patti smith" in The Gloucester County Times.

sjersey road trip lesson 4:
try everything,
keep going: even if you end up on an unpaved road, pinelands on both sides, ghosts wafting, recitations of piney legends on the wind -- and you end up having to turn around -- if you want to find ps, you have to look:
"Outside of society they're waiting' for me/Outside of society if you're looking/That's where you'll find me/Outside of society they're waitin' for me" ("Rock n Roll Nigger")

okay, so the local paper isn't "outside of society." but it's outside of any place i initially thought to look, smack dab in the midst of sjersey cult, ps hiding out in plain sight, how ironic, how in character, how nostalgic for the clash of woods and mall. she's not from deptford twnsp or woodbury, pitman (17 miles outside of, se of, philly, and the location of a vinyl pressing factory back in album days).

you'll see:
read through the "nostalgia" forum on http://www.nj.com, follow "rayosunshine" threads....